My partner recently hit and bit me mid-orgasm – it hurt like hell

DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner’s orgasms last ages and he swears like he has Tourette’s.

We are both 47. I’ve always been comfortable with his reaction as it assures me he is enjoying sex.

But, occasionally mid-orgasm, he has hit me and recently, he bit me twice. It hurt like hell.

After he bit me I was left with instant bruises and pain. I showed him and all he said was, “I thought I was biting myself, no wonder I didn’t feel it.”

He didn’t apologise and I’ve been left feeling angry and scared it could happen again.

Is this normal? He’s such an easy-going lovely man and there are no other issues with our relationship.

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DEIDRE SAYS: Some people become so sexually aroused that they lose their capacity to recognise what they are doing.

This, however, is no excuse. He must find a way to stop this happening.

You might be at serious risk from this man so let him know how upset, angry and scared you are.

The unpredictable nature of what happened makes it likely he could repeat it, so please consider the risks you take by having sex with him.

My support pack on Standing Up For Yourself will help you to talk to him.

You would both benefit from speaking to a counsellor who is experienced in sex and relationship therapy.

I recommend The College of Sexual & Relationship Therapists (, 020 8543 2707).

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